Pet Rabbits
For a good life: Work like a dog. Eat like a horse. Think like a fox. And play like a rabbit.
-George Allen
Many ask why I have a pet rabbit instead of a dog or a cat. I ask them why they want a deadly predator in their home. I’m joking but not. Deadly predators have been the pet of choice for generations. For me, the purpose of a pet is to enjoy their company when I want, while not impeding on my leisure time. My rabbit fits this well.
Rabbits are social animals. They like being around others and thus often need companions. I include my rabbit in my life. She comes to the office everyday, sees my friends, and attends dinners. It keeps her socialized and happy.
She loves or at least is cool with sitting on my lap or being held for long periods of time. She’s also great at just hanging out nearby doing her own thing. I’m writing this in my living room where she’s grooming, sprawling out, and running around entertaining herself.
There’s a language of dogs and a language of cats. The language and mannerisms of rabbits are completely different.
Prey animals have different personalities. Zoomies, binkies, chinning, clicking, grunting. Rabbits take food and hop away. It means something different when they hop away and kick their feet up at you. It means something else when they twitch like they’re in the matrix. You learn what these mean. The same way a dog owner knows when a dog prances around and puts their head down, it means they’re being playful. If I hand my pet to someone who has never held a rabbit before, she’ll freak out a bit. If someone who has owned a rabbit holds her, she’s calm the entire time. You need to learn to speak rabbit.
For me the choice was between a rabbit or dog. It wasn’t close.
Dogs
I love dogs… in short bursts. They’re in constant need of attention. Dogs are slobbery. Slobbery tennis balls and toys are everywhere. They bark. They’re generally noisy. Their hair is always a little oily even if you wash it. The neediness of dogs is incredibly annoying to me. They’re fun but after a bit, it’s like piss off. Go do your own thing.
Dogs can do way more tricks. They can play more games. If I lived on a ranch, that’d be cool, but I live in an apartment. It’s not a great place for a dog. Dog walks downtown aren’t great. Summer heat in Austin is brutal for them.
People are beholden to their dogs. “I have to walk my dog.” “I have to go home to feed my dog.” “I have to let my dog out to go potty.” I have friends who will leave an event, tend to their dog, then come back to the event. This is something they spend significant time and resources on. Pets are supposed to bring joy to your life, not obnoxious chores.
Why Rabbits Aren’t More Popular
I blame rabbit owners. Rabbit owners typically fall into two categories.
1) They don’t know how to raise a rabbit
Rabbits aren’t starter pets. They need at least as much care and attention as an indoor cat. If you can’t spend the time, then get them a companion. Make sure they’re spayed and neutered because they breed like… you know.
Rabbits are often left in hutches outside or left alone for long periods of time. Rabbits are social animals and need to be with others. Just because they don’t make noise doesn’t mean they don’t want attention. An untrained rabbit is as awful as an untrained dog. If you never trained a dog, they would poop everywhere and bark at everything. An untrained rabbit will be mean to others and shit and piss everywhere marking their territory. They get depressed and angry, which leads them to having short tempers and nipping at people. Research how to raise a bunny.
2) They over optimize for the wants of their rabbit
If you let a dog do whatever it wanted, you’d let them chase every car and every squirrel. Your walks would take hours as they smell every bush. You’d have to wait until they were done. There’s a large contingent of rabbit owners who legit let their rabbits do anything the rabbit wants. It’s crazy. A good owner teaches pets to obey and fit within the owner’s life. One should treat pets as well as possible, but when a rabbit grunts because they don’t want to be picked up, that’s too bad for the rabbit. Sometimes she’ll grunt and get upset with me when I brush her. That’s fine. I’m not going to wait until she’s in a more social mood. They’re our pets, not our bosses.
Rabbits
Rabbits are super clean. You aren’t supposed to wash rabbits. Just brush them. The small ones take less than a minute to brush. Besides constant self grooming, they’re clean because their poop doesn’t smell, and they’re easy to potty train. Their diet consists of hay, leafy greens, and fruit. Their existence nudges you to eat healthier. With the proper set up, you can even leave them alone for a few days. However, if you’re gone too long, they will get upset with you.
Rabbits are more delicate. You don’t shake a rabbit. You can scold them and firmly tell them no. They’ll understand. But if you yell too loudly, they get afraid and hide. Their hearing is extremely sensitive. They respond well to gentleness, to softly spoken words. When she’s in the car, I drive safer. She forces me to relax. She’s just a soft, fluffy little bunny.
That said, rabbits aren’t perfect. They chew on things. You need to train them to not chew on cords and baseboards. Teach them not to bite. They need to be brushed, especially if they’re shedding.
Similar to wolves and dogs, wild rabbits are almost a different species than domesticated rabbits. Certain survival instincts are bred out of them. A domesticated rabbit wouldn’t stand a chance in the wild the same way dogs can’t survive in the wild. But just seeing a bunny hop around is adorable. It’s entertaining. Watching a dog walk is rarely entertaining. Wolves aren’t cute. Wild rabbits are already cute so it takes a lot less to breed them to make you melt from their adorableness.
Rabbits do their own thing. You need to put in work to gain their affection and trust. They rarely make noise. Their size and quietness make them perfect to take on planes. An ex of mine used to travel with snakes on a plane. Rabbits are significantly easier. Going through TSA, there’s a lot more “awwws” than screams.
I didn’t go into cats, but no one wants their brain parasites. Predators are great if you’re using them for predator purposes. But one should beware they can snap at any moment. They’re still predators deep down. If you’re living in an urban area and want a clean, indoor pet… join the fluffle.