–Confucius
Luxury and hospitality are not the same.
Luxury means spending more. Something is considered luxurious if it’s the best, rarest, or most expensive product or service. Hospitality is creating an emotional connection customized to each individual. It’s about how you make someone feel, not what you give them.
Luxury impresses; hospitality connects. Luxury is transactional (pay more, get more), while hospitality is relational (care more, mean more).
Hospitality
The best gift I ever gave was a wedding gift that cost $25. I got a vintage journal. At the wedding, I went around to every married couple and asked them to write advice for the couple getting married. By the end of the night, the journal was packed full of loving advice and family stories.
At Eleven Madison Park, a group said they tried all the best food while visiting NYC, but wished they could have tried classic NYC street hot dogs. Hearing this, one of the managers went out and bought street hot dogs and had the chef prepare them as a special treat for the guests. It wasn’t expensive. The hot dogs were not luxurious, but the hospitality of getting and preparing the street hot dogs was an unforgettable moment for the clients.
Genuine hospitality means making people feel seen and valued by personalizing their experience.
Customization
One of the things Japan’s known for is its snack culture. Japan is home to some of the tastiest snacks—everything from protein bars to candy to high-end fruits (the square melons). The reason for this is odd, but it makes sense.
You’re supposed to bring a small gift each time you meet someone. Imagine receiving a trinket each time you had a meeting. If you have only three meetings per day, that’s 21 trinkets each week. Throwing away gifts is rude, so giving trinkets would force people to hoard. Not appropriate from the culture that brought us Marie Kando’s, “Does this spark joy?” To be considerate of the receiver of your gift, give something consumable.
But you want to offer a unique consumable fit to the person you’re meeting, not the same treats available everywhere. This led to Japan’s snack culture. Lower-end snacks are bought at a convenience store (I love 711 in Japan). High-end snacks are everything from wagyu beef to Yubari King melons to Sencha tea to wagashi (the cute little confections). The wide variety of snacks lets you customize your gift.
The Future of Hospitality
Eleven Madison Park systematized much of its hospitality—if clients had a number of drinks, it would send a hangover care packet to their hotel. If EMP overheard diners raving about a dish, it would give them an extra one to go.
This systemization can be done now for those who take the time. Instead of giving champagne to every client, a real estate broker could leave a new yoga mat in the room, which the client said would be great for meditation. If a client loves a musician, buy them the vinyl and maybe even the record player.
In the future, businesses will know almost everything about someone—where they grew up, their backstory, history, hobbies, allergies, and psychographics. Each individual can be treated how they want to be treated. We’ll be given suggestions we appreciate and food and gifts we love. No client surveys will be sent; it’ll be seamless.
Having smart systems know everything about us can be freaky. But there will be upsides. They can be hospitable in ways no one else can.